When I was a child the only time we paid any attention to Halloween was when we were allowed to hollow out a swede before punching a face into it with a potato peeler and sticking a candle up its bum.

Back in the 70s and 80s, the pumpkin had yet to find its way to the North of England and the only time we ever saw one was when they showed the Charlie Brown Halloween special on BBC1.

So during the 1990s when we began to import the American Halloween traditions, many of us felt that the world had gone insane. Why were children knocking on our doors asking for a trick or a treat? And why were they disappointed when we performed a card trick for them or pulled a rabbit out of their ear?

In the enlightened twenty-teens we are used to these customs, which is why my chums and I have made a lovely Halloween podcast for your ears. You can get it at or iTunes or just play it on this page.

I  hope that our willies go right up you.




Martin Wolfenden

Back in the early days of this Century, I made some money by saying the odd funny thing in public. On one of these occasions a fellow funny talker told me that I should write a blog (because that was the sort of thing funny talking people did back then.) Now, I’m not the sort of person who does things the easy way, so I rejected all the ready made blogging platforms and started my own website. Since then it’s become a repository for whatever stuff is bubbling out of my brains and a directory of various podcasts and videos that I’ve made with my friends and is completely unnecessary.

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