Spam!
It is a truth universally acknowledged that a man in posession of an email address must be in want of a cock stiffening drug.
However these are not the most disturbing spam messages. The most disturbing are the ones that ask if I would like a breast enlargement. I can just see it now; me, running down the street in a DD bra and bulging trousers.
I feel quite unwell at the very thought.
Anyway I must go I’ve apparently won the Mongolian lottery, I only need to send £2,000 to ensure I get the cheque.
Arse