It is a truth universally acknowledged that a man in posession of an email address must be in want of a cock stiffening drug.

However these are not the most disturbing spam messages. The most disturbing are the ones that ask if I would like a breast enlargement. I can just see it now; me, running down the street in a DD bra and bulging trousers.

I feel quite unwell at the very thought.

Anyway I must go I’ve apparently won the Mongolian lottery, I only need to send £2,000 to ensure I get the cheque.


Martin Wolfenden

Back in the early days of this Century, I made some money by saying the odd funny thing in public. On one of these occasions a fellow funny talker told me that I should write a blog (because that was the sort of thing funny talking people did back then.) Now, I’m not the sort of person who does things the easy way, so I rejected all the ready made blogging platforms and started my own website. Since then it’s become a repository for whatever stuff is bubbling out of my brains and a directory of various podcasts and videos that I’ve made with my friends and is completely unnecessary.

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